Be a Strategist and not a Individualist

Individualists are able to see the many conflicting aspects and polarities within themselves and in the world. The individualist deals with these irresolvable conflicts and paradoxes in part by remaining in the moment and allowing life to be as it is. There is still some confusion, however, about exactly how to navigate "what is" in a take charge way. The Individualist sees the paradoxes and contradictions of life, and accepts them, but in a passive, non-agentic way. It’s as if the Individualist resigns himself to ever ultimately knowing who he really is. The Individualist says, "I can’t control things so I’ll just accept that fact and groove on the moment."
The Strategist, on the other hand, has found a more sophisticated–and more practical–way of dealing with the paradoxes and polarities of life. Instead of merely resigning himself to the way things are, the Strategist is better able to integrate and own many different and conflicting parts of him and actually work with the ever-shifting contexts of life in a practical way. This is made possible in part by the Strategist’s new ability to consciously and intentionally generate his own meanings, to "write his own story." The Individualist sees that all meaning depends upon the context and the relationships involved, but has not yet figured out how to be in charge of this meaning-making in a practical way.
The Strategist is able to take charge of his meaning-making in a way the Individualist could not. As a result, he navigates the constantly shifting contexts he experiences, without being flustered by them. "No story is real," says the Strategist, "but that doesn’t matter. I can create a story in this moment in order to create the outcome I want, even if that story doesn’t represent ultimate truth

Moving Rocks

Here is a story I read that was written by an unknown author. Life can sometimes be a struggle and when we try to face all difficulties alone we can sometimes come up on the short end. This story could imply toward a spiritual concept for some.

A little boy was spending his Saturday morning playing in his sandbox. He had with him his box of cars and trucks, his plastic pail, and a shiny, red plastic shovel. In the process of creating roads and tunnels in the soft sand, he discovered a large rock in the middle of the sandbox.
The boy dug around the rock, managing to dislodge it from the dirt. With a little bit of struggle, he pushed and nudged the rock across the sandbox by using his feet. (He was a very smallboy, and the rock was very large.) When the boy got the rock to the edge of the sandbox however, he found that he couldn't roll it up and over the little wall.
Determined, the little boy shoved, pushed, and pried, but everytime he thought he had made some progress, the rock tipped and then fell back into the sandbox. The little boy grunted,struggled, pushed, & shoved; but his only reward was to have the rock roll back, smashing his chubby fingers.
Finally he burst into tears of frustration. All this time the boy's father watched from his living room window as the drama unfolded. At the moment the tears fell, a large shadow fell across the boy and the sandbox. It was the boy's father. Gentlybut firmly he said,
"Son, why didn't you use all the strength that you had available?"
Defeated, the boy sobbed back,
"But I did, Daddy, I did! I used all the strength that I had!"
"No, son," corrected the father kindly.
"You didn't use all the strength you had. You didn't ask me."
With that the father reached down, picked up the rock and removed it from the sandbox.
Do you have "rocks" in your life that need to be removed? Are you discovering that you don't have what it takes to lift them? There is One who is always available to us and willing to give us the strength we need. Isn't it funny how we try so hard to do things ourselves.